I'm only getting started....

So, I keep seeing updates on a bunch of the people I went to high school with...and to say the least, it makes me really proud that I went down the path I did. I didn't party it up during my high school years, I wasn't the most popular kid in the school, and at the time...I really thought that there was something wrong with me for it. Don't get me wrong, everyone knew me and for the most part everyone liked me - it's not like I was bullied or made fun of anymore than most people....but I still wasn't like the Homecoming Queen or invited to some of the parties....and I know some people, if not a lot of people, thought I was a loser or a dork for it. It really kinda bothered me back in the day.

But now....I'm cool with how I lived my life back in high school. The whole "working really hard in high school to get into a good school, and graduating from it" thing has really, really turned out well. I'm happy, I'm incredibly successful for only being 24, and I'm living my life on my terms, without crazy personal responsibilities (like a child or a marriage, for example). I'll have those later....but for now, I'm really liking where I am and I'm really enjoying the fact that my hard work has paid off. I can honestly say that I'm an RTHS success story....and there aren't tons and tons of those. That might not be the nicest thing to say - and don't get me wrong, there are enough people who have been/are going to be successful - but for the most part, it's just a small town school that is going to breed a bunch of people who stay in that small town and their children will repeat the cycle. So therefore, what I said might not be nice....but it's honest and I'm pretty pleased with how my life is turning out. :)

"I'm only getting started
I won't blackout
This time I've got nothing to waste
Let's go a little harder
I'm on fire
I won't blackout
I'm on my way."
~Blackout, Breathe Carolina

But don't play with me, cause you're playing with fire...

I have this little tendency to do things that I shouldn't do.

Nothing super scandalous, but....still, probably not totally in my best interests.

We'll see how this goes.... :)

The Grass isn't always Greener....

Since my last post, I became the Manager of a Credit Union in my area. On the surface, that's awesome. I'm 23 years old and already a manager (which is what I wanted, obviously).

What they don't tell you about being a Credit Union manager is that you are the President and CEO of the company. Manager is a very, VERY misleading title. I was assuming I'd be like...middle management, working with people, occasionally doing some financial reports or something. WRONG. I do EVERYTHING. I am effectively HR, Accountant, and everything else all rolled into one person. Also, I wasn't told about the state of the credit union I'm at. They're losing money at quite a rapid pace. Basically, I'm on the Titanic with a thimble to bail myself out. I'm so stressed out sometimes that I can hardly breathe.

Basically, lesson learned. Grass isn't greener on the other side. Life will improve - I am the luckiest person in the world like that. I'm sure I'll end up on my feet sooner rather than later. :)

What to do, what to do.....

I really, really hate being graduated from college. I'm making like....no money, all of the money I do make goes towards bills, and...it's honestly just exhausting. It doesn't help that all I really wanna do is save money so I can buy a house. :( I felt the need to vent to the universe here. haha

On the bright side...even though I'm broke and going a bit crazy, I have decided that I AM going to ITALY in the summer of 2013. Thank goodness for 2+ years of preparation and tax refunds.

There's a Party on the rooftop, Top of the World....

So, I haven't written on this thing in forever. I was tempted to delete the last post entirely...but I guess that that's what I was thinking about and what I was feeling. You can't really go into the past and change how you felt, so...I'm gonna leave it. Reminder of what is and what wasn't meant to be. Needless to say, the whole "Lyle" situation didn't work out. Oh well. It's life and it goes on.

Since the last post, I've graduated college and have my first full-time job. It's oh so very exciting. At the moment, I'm debating whether or not I want to stay on the path I'm on, or go back to school and move in a new direction. I just want to be more sure of my decision this time than I was last time. I really didn't like my major. It's very versitile and will eventually help me, I'm sure...but I'm really too much of an optimist to face the very real realities of the "business world." I used to think that I could start a business with a $100, a wing, and a prayer. Um...no. Not realistic. I'm actually thinking about teaching and eventually being a principal and/or superintendent. We'll see. It could happen.

Right now....I'm just enjoying my life. It's quite a bit more boring now that I don't have any boy drama, school drama, or any real drama that makes a bit of difference to me. But....it's SO much more peaceful. :)

That's the quick update on my life. It's going wonderfully. :)

Boys, Boys, Boys

This summer has literally been the craziest one I think I've ever had. Why is this? Because of guys.

After a million tears, a little money lent, and being led on for 4 years, I finally ended my flirtation with a certain person. I'll go into that a little later, but really? He didn't matter all that much. He taught me a lot about what I want in a relationship and what I won't tolerate. Looking at the situation now, I realize that I didn't care for him as much as I thought I did and I definitely don't want to be with someone like him. So, I basically told him he could take a hike and I'd talk to him once he grew up a little more. I was done being the other girl.

While this is true, the real reason I ended it was because of a new person. I really liked this guy (we'll call him Lyle) and thought that he could be a good match for me. He's VERY attractive, funny, sarcastic, and basically everything that I wanted. Things progressed quickly, but well. I genuinely liked him and thought that Lyle and I could have a future. Fast forward 2 weeks from a date that had significance....when I found out that Lyle has a pretty serious on-off girlfriend and A TWO-YEAR OLD DAUGHTER.

Anyone who knows me knows that I love kids. The fact that he has a daughter wouldn't have bothered me at all. Neither would the girlfriend thing, as long as he wasn't with me and her at the same time. The thing that really bothers me is that he didn't tell me. And his explanation? "I like you a lot...but I didn't think it was relevant." Am I wrong in thinking that it is? He thinks I'm overreacting...and I don't.

The really annoying part of all of this? I gave up Guy #1 to be with Lyle. And while I don't ant anything to do with Guy #1, it annoys me that I moved from thinking about Guy #1 occasionally to thinking about Lyle ALL. THE. TIME. I used to be a drama queen....hence the title of this blog. But I'm really over all of that. Why is it that when we think we're setting ourselves up for happiness, we're really just setting ourselves up for disappointment? It's a depressing thought, but...I'm thinking it's true.

And I'm also thinking about converting to Catholicism and being a nun.